For New Old Moms to Learn Old New Tricks
When I was a kid the world was obsessed with Tatum O’Neal, Bobby Fischer, Brooke Shields, Donny Osmond, Linda Blair and Michael Jackson- They were super young, crazy gifted… though, as they grew, some of them turned out to also be super crazy. I didn’t have any innate gifts other than a hefty imagination. I could draw, but that wasn’t going to land me on…
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She finally asked. I should have known it was coming due to currently being entrenched in the ‘why’ phase. Becky showed up with her one-month-old baby girl Eleanor and her two-year-old son Felix, who is having difficulty sharing his Momma (and her boobs), with an interloper/new little sister. It’s a win-win afternoon all around. I get my baby cuddle fix, volunteering to hold (and smell)…
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Do you have your oldster role model yet? I do. I’ve decided that when the time comes to dump the dye and let my gray flag fly, I’ll pull a pewter-silver pixie cut up top, maybe with a little St. Vincent lavender undertone. Based on my body type and what I project menopause will do to my waist, I’m imagine I’ll rock the Eileen Fisher,…
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Apparently on the youthful side of the Victor Hugo quote, “Forty is the old age of youth, fifty is the youth of old age” I’m in the interesting position of mom to a toddler and daughter to parents aging out of their second-hand youth. I now see our 50s as ‘the warning years’. Potential health issues that could affect the rest of my life loom…
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I know why Betty Draper is bitter. I know why the caged bird sings. It’s all about the evil hum of the dishwasher. When I didn’t find my husband by 40, I became my own husband. I assembled my own IKEA Hemnes daybed, alone. (The IKEA Hemnes daybed assembly manual is about the size and heft of a Fall Vogue. It took me three full…
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Becoming a parent later (how’s that for a euphemism?) is as much about deciding the kind of mother you don’t want to be as deciding the kind of mother you fully intend to be. If you’re an Old Mom like me, everyone you know has already had their children, so you’ve done your research. You’ve had plenty of time watching your siblings and cousins and friends…
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As an Irish Catholic-German Jew hybrid, I’m so pale some parts of me are as see through as a Vietnamese Spring Roll. I don’t burn, I blister. I’ve elevated avoiding the sun to an artisanal craft, worthy of a weekend workshop. My husband (also a whitey-mcwhite) and I are the ecstatic parents of our black daughter. And our use of the word ‘black’ to describe…
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